[ She ends up hugging the book to her chest in earnestness, her chin dipped low as she glances at the edges of it. Part of her keeps playing the moments she had in Idris over and over again. If only she'd given it to Jace, if only she hadn't thought it better that she had it on her. But she hadn't trusted him to do the right thing by Jocelyn, he'd still not come around to the fact that she was his mother and Clary wasn't sure he ever would. Here was the boy who should be her brother - part of the family - and she hadn't believed he'd help her. ]

Do you remember when you asked me if it was a struggle to remember her smile? [ Looking up, her mouth twisted into something sad. ] It's not just the CDC that's keeping her from me. I told you about Valentine. My mom was hiding from him. She took this potion. I don't know what it did to her. I don't know what it was. Nobody does. But it made her sleep. It just ... made her go away.

[ She sighs and it's like an ache in her chest. She's been ignoring it since she came here but the wound's still open and gaping. ] She had this whole other life that I never knew about and it's like ... it's like not being able to add up the person I knew to every story I've heard since Jace found me. I've been thinking about this stupid book for weeks, but the cure - that seems like forever. And now it's here and not there and I've failed her.